Guilt

You know when you do something terrible and your guilty conscience keeps creeping up on you every time? That’s happening to me right now. I did the worst thing possible. I never meant to do it but it just happened. I never meant to cheat on Casey. One minute Jake and I were having a laugh and then one thing led to another and we ended up having sex. Yes, I had sex with my boyfriend’s best friend. We weren’t even drunk.

It’s been almost a week since the incident and I can’t take it anymore. I have been crying my eyes out, I can’t look at Casey because I know I’d start crying if I did and Jake has been calling me but I don’t want to talk to him. It’s not his fault, it’s our fault, but I feel like he should’ve stopped it from happening. Heck, I don’t know why I didn’t stop it from happening.

I know that Casey knows that something is wrong because I’ve been distant and very upset this past week. But how can I face him. I want to tell him but if I do that would ruin our relationship and his friendship with Jake. It could ruin stereo kicks. I can’t let that happen.

I was about to get something to eat from the kitchen when I heard the door open. I knew it was Casey because only he has the keys to my apartment. But I can hear so much noise it sounds like there are at least two people. When I go out I find a very angry Casey, with Jake and Jake has a black eye.

“I’m so sorry Denise,” Jake said starting to cry.

No, no, no this can’t be happening.

“Please tell me it’s not true,” Casey said to me angrily, “Tell me you did not cheat on me with my best friend. Tell me it never happened.”

Oh my god.

He knows.